Sunday, October 01, 2006

underdog

looking at singapore idol poster in my room...i pasted "underdog" on hady's pic a few months back...thinking he'd the potential to win...and he did...although i was rooting for jonathan...no regrets tat hady won since he can sing...but i was horrified by the difference of votes between jon & hady...jon only garnered 30% votes...& my 5 votes were included...juz wan to clarify tat i support jon not becos of his looks...but he can sing too...but vocally lost out to hady...& hady can also be on par with jon in terms of looks since he looks charming in his way...so as the cliche says...both are winners....

talk a bit abt the s'pore idol performance show tat i went live in s'pore indoor stadium...is better than i expected...the sound system is simply great though the visual part is horrible (my seats are far far away lohz...) but i dun care since it's free tickets anyway...the atmosphere is very high...u can really feel the hype & how things are operated...totally diff frm watching television...hahaz...and i also went to grab goodie bags (we are not supposed to have those...i think which is unfair lahz...) becos i juz resist free stuff...wahahaz...so next time i dun going to a concert afterall...but of cos...with better seats!

back to serious note...i got back all my prelim results...there's sure to be shockers & demoralisers...generally i think i did badly...at least not up to my expectations...i saw it coming but juz tat i dun wan to accept the reality somehow...as wat i told ong...at this pt in time...passing a sub is not the key anymore...it's abt getting a respectable grade...u see...having a pass does not satisfy me anymore (at least it does in the past...hehez) i'm beginning to hunger for more...becos i'm scared tat i'll disappoint ppl around me...i'm carrying a burden tat's permanent...(feels like as if i'm an inexperienced crown prince waiting to ascend the throne...) wahahaz...better dun let my nerves get me...

one says tat we shld reflect on our prelims...finding our strengths & weaknesses...i guess i've more weaknesses...hahaz...i realised tat i get freaked out & partially black out easily...probably becos i was afraid to under perform...so i'm trying to find back the carefree and happy-go-lucky self...cos under those circumstances...maybe i really perform at ease...and naturally...stuff will come to ur head...i was murdered by my carelessness during this exams...for subs supposedly to be my a bit stronger ones...so things are really unpredictable & unexpected....

being a capricorn...we are known to be ambitious & competitive...but surely enough...i dun find these features in me...but totally opposite...but slowly...i realise these features are in me in a diff. way...frankly speaking...i aspire to be an underdog...where ppl focus on the hot faves...letting their guard down on underdogs' potential to shine...i really envy ppl who can improve tremendously in their grades in short period of times...shocking every individual...showing ppl tat despise them b4 tat they can succeed too...hahaz...hot faves are also in hard positions to maintain well...i'm not a consistent player but i need a breakthrough to show wat i'm made of at least...but it's gonna be really really tough!

believe ourselves tat we are underdogs or dark horses( we've not failed yet!)...there may be hot faves everywhere...but who noes...with our own capabilites & strive...we can also be recognised & respected for who we are...i dun wanna be the best...but to be somebody who's proud of my ownself....

ahhhh----but it's going to be a tough battle to fight...haiz....(cos i'm more of 'words' than 'action' person...hahaz...)

btw...hAppy ChILdReN'S DAy....although i'm not a child for dunno how many yrs already...but least i'm very young at heart...hahaz...

tat's it at 3:38 PM

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